orteil42:

texas so far :

  • ambient air is like someone is breathing on you. all the time
  • all cars and TVs are at least 3 times the size of their european counterpart
  • texas, USA really wants to remind you that you are in texas, USA
  • i can see like 3 american flags from the front yard
  • what’s with Miracle Whip ?
  • everything gives off the impression that i’m both in a cozy welcoming place and about to get shot
  • why do you people need so many variations of everything. seriously guys you don’t need cinnamon-flavored broomsticks, what the fuck
  • ads for really greasy food marketed as organic
  • ads for meds with tons of side-effects, mostly for dealing with consequences of eating really greasy food. also usually marketed as organic
  • ads for lawyers and insurance, mostly for dealing with consequences of meds with tons of side-effects. haven’t seen any organic marketing for those yet but i’m waiting
  • if it’s not fried or smoked, it’s pickled

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